|
|
I sometimes feel that life is unfair.
I feel angry with God, or whoever's in charge, for making it this
way.
I didn't know, until now, that it was possible for things to change.
Maybe I shouldn't have found out.
A usual mission
finished. Another day without any progress in my love life. Like always, he was silently pulling weeds or walking the dog
(we did a countless number of missions today), while Naruto and I yelled at each other. It's not that my hopes were set high
or anything, it's just that I feel like I'm leaving him out when we're all laughing and he's just standing there silently.
I want him to somehow be able to join us, but I know it's impossible. That's what I hate about life, why can't he be happy
like everyone else? He has the right to, just as anyone else on earth does. Then why is he the only one that has to be this
miserable.
Before our
team broke up I decided to make my usual call: "Sasuke kun? You wanna walk home together?"
"Asking
again? What are you gonna do walking home with me? You know it's further for me to go your way anyway."
Not like
I was expecting anything good. It still hurt me though. Like a thousand needles pricking me in my chest every time he said
something like that. I gloomily walked my way home. I passed the construction site that had made no progress for about a month.
Apparently some rich guy was rebuilding his house. I didn't know the details, but he kept on complaining and having them redo
something, so it was taking twice as much time. Today they were hauling big metal bars up. I wasn't really paying much attention
though. I was busy trying to keep the tears from coming out, which takes quite a lot of concentration you know.
I asked myself
why he couldn't be a normal boy. Why he couldn't even do little things as friends, I mean, plenty of guys go out or walk home
with girls as friends. And maybe if we did something fun he'd forget all the sad things happening in his life and look happy
once in a while. I thought I heard a faint scream somewhere in the back of my mind: "Hey kid, look out!"
I ignored
it. Then another scream followed, "Sakura!" That snapped me out of it. But the next moment there was a shove, a big clanging
noise, and then I went blank.
* * *
I woke up
in a hospital room. I felt a streak of pain all along my left side. When I looked at my left arm and left leg and saw that
they looked pretty bruised. "Sakura chan!" A childish voice screamed.
I looked
up to see the usual face of Naruto, looking relieved.
"Naruto,
what happened? I don't remember anything."
Naruto
was silent. I could sense that something wasn't right.
"What
is it Naruto?"
"You
know that construction site? Well, the rope that was hauling up a bunch of metal bars broke. You were under them, and you
didn't notice so Sasuke ran up to you and shoved you out of the way. You were safe; one metal bare hit the left side of your
body but missed your head and all. . . .Sasuke was crushed by the remaining ones."
I
sat up straight. Sasuke kun? Crushed? "I, is he ok? Is he alive?" "
They don't
know. He's still unconscious, and the bars hit his head pretty bad."
About a hundred
emotions swam through my head at once. Sasuke kun was half dead because of me. If I wasn't stupid and was just paying attention
we would all be at home doing our usual thing. His life already is like a tragedy, what if it ends here because of me? No,
no that isn't supposed to happen. He isn't supposed to die until he can somehow experience happiness, at least once.
I sprung
out of bed without much thought. I forgot about my leg and the moment I put my weight on it a pain I'd never felt before shot
through it. I collapsed on the floor but desperately tried to pick myself up.
"Sakura
chan are you ok?"
"I'm fine.
Lend me you shoulder, I need to see Sasuke kun."
We
went down the narrow hallway of the hospital. Naruto silently took me into the room where Sasuke lay. He was unconscious,
as Naruto told me, and had bandages all over him. Kakashi was leaning on a wall by the room.
"Kakashi
sen . .."
"No
broken bones, but the blow on the head was apparently quite fatal."
Naruto led
me to the chair next to his bed. I plopped myself on it and stared into his face. He looked so calm, just lying there, when
in reality he had gone through so much. I couldn't bear looking into his face. I hated myself for even being alive, being
well, being an airhead all the time while other people were suffering. It was at that moment.
"Sasuke?"
I looked
up. Sasuke kun had opened his eyes! I suddenly forgot about everything I was thinking before. All of the self-denial was drowned
away by sheer happiness. "Sasuke kun your alive!" I cried clinging onto his neck.
He
sat up. I noticed that he had a funny look on his face. Like it was puzzled, or more like confused. He stared at us all, and
then finally at me and said the words that I'll never forget:
"Who are
you?"
* * *
The words
are still ringing in my ears, repeatedly, over and over again. At first I didn't want to believe that was what had happened.
But when the doctors showed me the x-rays and all I decided that I had to believe it, because it was the truth. Sasuke kun
had lost his memory.
"Who are
you?"
"Sasuke kun?"
"Where am
I? Who am I? I can't remember anything. . . Arrrghh. . .!"
"Sasuke kun,
calm down." When I first realized all I could do was hold him in my arms. He was holding his head in his hands and screaming.
Sweat trickled
down his forehead. I wanted to do something, but there's nothing an individual can do about someone's brain. I didn't want
to admit it.
The doctor
talked to us privately. He called us into the room where he'd posted up the x-rays of Sasuke kun's brain. "He needs rest,"
was the first thing he announced. "But you should never leave him alone. Loneliness sometimes drives them into madness, and
make sure he's always comfortable. Victims can only remember things when they are relaxed."
"Sir," Kakashi
sensei interrupted. "That would sort of be impossible. You see, he doesn't have a family."
The doctor
was silenced. He lifted an eyebrow at Kakashi sensei and started looking at his notes while sighing loudly at it. "Um. . ."
I said, unable to contain myself. "I think I'd be able to look after him for a while."
The three
heads turned to me at once. It feels weird when people do that. "Well, it's just that. It was my fault in the first place
and, I feel a lot of responsibility towards it."
The doctor
smiled and said, "that's good, it'll be easier for him to remember by a friend rather than being with a stranger." He jotted
down a few notes and got up. It was decided.
* * *
"Sakura san?"
"Huh?"
I still wasn't
used to him putting a "san" at the end of my name. It sounded so formal, not like the conceited Sasuke kun that would usually
call me "hey you" or something like that.
"I just wanted
to thank you again, for all your doing. I understand that Sasuke must have been an important person to you, I'll try to remember
things as soon as possible."
I just stared
at his face. We were walking to my place with his change of clothes and a bunch of other stuff. Why was he so polite? It made
me feel kind of weird, to have someone with the same face and appearance being so different. I wasn't quite sure if I felt
comfortable about it or if I didn't like it. But I still had to remember that this was a different person. The real Sasuke
is temporarily gone.
"It's
ok. I hope you remember too," I said, making an effort to smile. The funny thing was that he smiled back. It was so strange
that I didn't know how I felt.
The night
proceeded at this rate. We ate, talked, and went to bed early. I sat up on my bed with my book open, but I was really just
staring at the wall thinking. I hadn't told him about the Uchiha tragedy. I decided that was the last thing he needed to know.
It just killed me how he was so different just by missing that fact. Not knowing he had a tragic past made him a whole different
person. Someone who could smile, talk, be polite. I decided not to think too much on the topic. It's the end if I fall in
love with the new Sasuke.
-TO BE CONTINUED-
|
|
|
